Wednesday 9 July 2014

Nope. Nope, nope.

  Whenever I am in public with my brother, and my parents are doing productive things with their lives, people often mistake me as a teen mom. I remember it like it was just last summer. Because it was. We went to a football game, and my parents went off to buy us some junk food before the game. I guess the woman behind us was blind until my parents left, and she started talking to me:

Her: Aw, wow, he's so well behaved (She says talking about my brother)

Me: Hehe, yeah, I guess.

Her: How old is he?

Me: Oh he's eight years old.

Her: Wow, you must have had him really early. (If I had a kid who is eight, and I am fourteen, then I would have had him when I was six. MATH! MATH, PEOPLE! Not sure what's more surprising, the fact that I am preaching about Math or the fact that people think I would have a kid at six.

Me: (Suddenly confused) Um..

Her: Well y'know my daughter is a teen mom as well, and she just had her kid. (She turns and faces my brother) You have a really good mother!

Me: He he, um, well you see, he's actually not my son. He's my brother...

Her: (Realizes) Oh, right.

I always tell people this, but they just sort of give me this look like: Yeah, right. Your brother that you squished out of your uterus!

So, no, I did not have a kid at six just in case you were wondering. Also, lady behind me at football game can you get some new glasses? Yeah, because if I ever see you again I don't want you asking me if I am my grandmother's sister, or my brother's in-law or whatever else you have planned. (in case you were wondering, I'm neither).